story about sardine

I remember that the first fish dish I made was this sweet sardine kabayaki dish.

I went to Victorian Market and one of the guy in the fish stall was telling me that
he can give me 12 sardines for only $5.

Very cheap!

At that time, I wasn't quite sure what sardine was, but the guy kept telling me it is such a good price that I should get them.

I asked him how I should cook sardine, and he said,

"it's easy, just grill them!"

Today, I know that whenever I ask him this question about any fish in his store, he always bluffs and tell me to grill everything.

But at that time I didn't know him well and I was tricked.

When I came home and stood in the kitchen, I realized something was wrong.



How do I grill fish?


I was scared.

My sardines in a plastic bag were all bleeding.




I called my mom in Japan.

That what I do whenever I'm in troble.


I asked her how i can grill sardines.

she asked me rather carefully

"does sardine have its head?"


I said
"yes."


she said

"Ok, the first thing you gotta do is to squeeze the head and tear it out from the sardine body."


"WHAT?"


"you're so brave, my girl. I never buy dardine with its head. I buy the ones already nicely opend because I'm scared of taking its head off."


I said
"it's not fair!"


I was so depressed.

But my mom told me that once i go through this preparation process, i can cook my favorite dish, sweet sardine kabayaki.



I love kabayaki. so I gained motivation.


There is no fish swiming without its head off.
If you buy fish without its head, that means somebodyelse is doing the job for you.

I thought I should show appriciation to my sardines fish for giving me their life.



At that time, I was sharing a house with 9 other girls (we had individual bed rooms), and when I started to cook sardine, some girls came out from their rooms to check what I was doing.

Some of them said,

"Hey, what are you doing tomo?! looks so disgusting!" and run away.

Others said "Oh gosh, it is so smelly! " and went back to their rooms.

But there was one housemate who supported me.
She was quietly observing me dealing with the fish.
She didn't say anothing.

It was when I finished the hardest part of preparation and started to gril the fish with sauce, she said

"smells good and looks good. can i try some?"

We had dinner together with the sardines I cooked.

She said

"it tastes really good!"

and I agreed.

Yes, without your support, I couldn't cook kabayaki.

since then, sardine kabayaki becomes the most attached fish dish to me.